Have you ever experienced anticlimax?
What do I mean? I mean the depression and moodiness that follows the accomplishment of an important goal.
Anyone who has read this blog before knows I completed the National Novel Writing Month challenge in November of 2009. I was extremely proud of myself for completing that task, and I still am. I learned a lot, and I had great expectations as to where my writing was going to go in the aftermath.
What I didn’t count on was the crushing anticlimactic downer that was waiting to smack me in the face in December. I’ve learned from earlier experiences with anticlimax in my life that the key to overcoming it was to be sure that I had another important goal lined up for immediately after achieving the present goal. I did that. I set a word goal for December (30,000 words), and intended to repeat that goal as a regular routine for every month thereafter.
I thought it was a good goal, and I was right. It is a great goal.
The only problem was, I didn’t want to write. I had spent the previous month writing, almost obsessively, writing even when I didn’t want to write, because I was committed enough to the goal that I HAD to write.
Then December came and I somehow got in touch with my petulant childhood brat and decided
“No, I don’t want to write, and YOU CAN’T MAKE ME!!!”
I’m embarrassed to admit that I let that attitude conquer me. I allowed my writing routine to be disrupted. I gave in to depression and ennui, and took a very long and unplanned hiatus from my vision of who I am and what I aim to accomplish.
For those of you who have honored me with your readership in the past, I apologize for my long absence, and I hope that you will continue to travel along this difficult road with me.
From the day this blog was born, I have committed to sharing the real story of my experiences in trying to build a writing career, and relating the highs (and the lows) honestly, even when they don’t cast me in the best light.
I am happy to say that I have dusted myself off, and climbed back on the horse, and am back to a regular writing routine.
I would love to know if any of you have also had to deal with the anticlimax blues, and if so, how did you manage to overcome it? Maybe by sharing, our future bouts with that particular demon can be cut short, and even eliminated.
January 17, 2010 at 4:45 pm |
I love your blog!
Anticlimatic is exactly how I felt when I finished writing my book. It was as if someone had turned a light off in my head.
I wish I could have started another project straight away but I felt too wiped out and just wanted to be.
I had the same feeling after my first book too, I was relieved to finish but at the same time I felt so lost.
Now I know what to expect.
Next time I’d certainly have a change of scenery, maybe have a holiday booked to celebrate my completed work, bring some proper closure and return to start afresh.
Thanks for posting the blog. It was very interesting.
January 17, 2010 at 5:01 pm |
Thank you so much, Michelle! It’s great to know I’m not the only one.
Somehow, I suspect it will not be the last time this little gremlin will need to be dealt with, but it’s good to know it can be defeated.
January 17, 2010 at 6:28 pm |
Firstly, I’m delighted to see you back!
This is a topic very close to my own heart as I’ve felt like throwing in the towel more times than I care to remember. One being, very recently…. After giving myself a stern talking too, however, I mulled over what I’d actually achieved. I have written a book. Hook, line and sinker. I put my money where my mouth is and did it. (As you did with NaNo). And yes, I felt depressed. Still do if the truth be told. In my eyes, my novel will never be good enough. But let go of it, I must. It will be the death of me otherwise.
I know exactly how you feel. It takes a great deal of energy to write. The ability to maintain positive throughout our journey would be worth bottling, my friend!
Anyway, perhaps your hiatus has put the spring back in your step. You posted a blog after all…finally….just saying
As we say, Down Under; Keep rattling those dags. Good on ya mate!
PS. It means; soldier on…
January 17, 2010 at 9:32 pm |
I guess if it were easy, everyone would do it and do it successfully. I have a feeling that you will be among those stalwart souls that conquers the odds and carves out your own niche in the publishing universe. You have a great personality, and that sparkles through your written words.
Thank you for the encouragement, and I’m very happy to back. I look forward to continuing our correspondence!
February 11, 2010 at 4:36 pm |
Just checking in to see if you’ve got back on that horse?
Don’t forget, you’ve got the riding gear and the natural talent. Just saying…
March 12, 2010 at 2:59 pm |
I am very grateful that you thought of me, Wendy, and I apologize profusely for not replying sooner. I’m happy to say that I have re-mounted the horse and have been staying pretty busy with my writing. Where I have stumbled and faltered is in the arena of social media and blogging. I have not been as active on Facebook or WordPress as I have in the past, which I’m not pleased with, but I’ve allowed myself to focus more on my writing than on my talking about writing, since that was the direction my internal current was leading me to.
I have missed interacting with fine writers such as yourself, though, and I am trying to organize myself better so I can make time to do it all.
I turned the page on another year with the celebration of my birthday this past week, and I spent the day in soul-searching and goal-setting. I am hoping to have a much more productive year ahead, and look forward to feeling a greater sense of accomplishment on my next birthday!
I remember that you were planning to focus more energy on your writing toward the end of last year. So, please tell me, how have your writing projects been going?
March 12, 2010 at 8:43 pm |
Deighted to know you’re still around!
I’m actually going to take a leaf out of your fine book. Spend more time writing. Less time talking about it. And much less time blogging. I too celebrated a birthday (if you could call it that) at the beginning of the year. And where I am now with my writing, is not where I anticipated I would be. Still struggling. Dreams not met. Disappointment hangs over me like a constant shadow. But I don’t have to tell you what that’s like. I imagine you understand.
Weeks/months appear to fly by in a blink of an eye these days. Like the old adage: The older you get….
I’ve got myself into a rut in which I’m having trouble getting out of to be honest. In fact, I haven’t even given my MS a cursory glance since Christmas, which makes me feel thoroughly guilty and thoroughly ashamed of myself.
The delightful highs and lows of wanting to be more than I am.
By the way, I’m thrilled you’ve mounted the horse. You’ll make it. I know you will. Keep in touch
PS. Sorry for leaving a blog on your blog!
March 13, 2010 at 11:06 am |
You’re right . . . I understand EXACTLY what you’re talking about. And I wish I had a dollar for every writer who I’ve read feel the same way.
I find myself gravitating toward the advice of authors who recommend a system for writing. Not a formula, because formulas lead to formulaic and cliched writing, but a system, a means of organizing work that propels one forward.
I stumbled across an author by the name of Karen S. Wiesner, who has penned a couple of interesting instruction books. Now, I know there is no end to people writing about how to write, but here’s where Ms. Wiesner stands out: Between 2005 and 2008, she published 36 books! Most of those are novels and novellas, but a couple of them were to share her system for working. I picked up two books she wrote that go hand in hand with one another, called “First Draft in 30 Days” and “From First Draft to Finished Novel.”
She also has a couple of websites http://www.angelfire.com/stars4/kswiesner/ and http://firstdraftin30days.com/ where she shows all the different projects she’s completed in the past couple of years and what she has lined up for 2010. She always has about six projects going at the same time, and she explains how she juggles them all in a way that keeps her motivated and feeling accomplished. Since those are things that I want to feel myself, I’m starting to learn and apply her suggestions. As a result, I’m feeling a bit more hopeful and optimistic than I have been recently.
I’m attaching an article she wrote in response to a reader’s question “How do you produce so much in a given year?” Her answer is here: http://www.angelfire.com/stars4/kswiesner/productivityarticle.pdf
Perhaps it will help you see a different outcome for the rest of this year.
For me, I’m trying not to beat myself up too badly for my lack of productivity. I’m just trying to make this year more productive than last year, and I’m hoping having a better system for doing that may help.
You wouldn’t be discouraged if writing was not important to you. And if writing is important to you, it deserves the same stubbornness and persistence that anything else that’s important in your life brings out in you. I believe your interest in writing will keep you plugging along until you reach the goals you envision for yourself.
You will do it. And I want to know about it when you do!
March 13, 2010 at 4:42 pm |
Thank you, Sage.
Most kind of you to leave the links. Will pop over their immediately.
All the best.
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